I know there are different approaches to raising children and I don’t claim to be an expert. However, I do find fault in spanking and here is why: I believe everyone deserves respect. Whether age 1 or age 101, all human beings should be treated with kindness and respect. This is where spanking falls down.
I became a single mom when my children were 6 and 3; it was difficult at times and there are many moments I’d like a “do over.” I only spanked them once though and I’ll never forget it. We were driving down the street and they were fighting. I asked them to stop again and again but they wouldn’t. It was one of those situations when I could feel the anger rising up in me – like a thermostat turning red.
I lost my temper, swerved to the curb, and jolted the car to a stop. I got out, slammed the car door shut, and opened the back door. I will never forget the look of fear on their little faces. I was so angry that I spanked them both once and then got back into my seat. I sat in the silence and thought about what had just happened. Is this what I wanted to teach them? Is this the behavior I wanted them to emulate? I was ashamed to the core.
I never spanked them again. Life wasn’t perfect and I am no angel -I broke some things, slammed some doors and cupboards, stormed out of the house, and spent a fair amount of time crying too. But I never raised a hand to them.
How did they turn out? Well, they’re 17 and 14 now, their rooms are messy most days, they get really good grades, they don’t do their laundry until they’re out of clothing, they love video games, they eat constantly, and they’re pretty typical teens. But they’re respectful and helpful to everyone we meet, and for that, I am truly grateful.